If I keep writing about someone else’s story
The ache in my heart will have hope to transform into something beautiful
Tag: emotions
There is No Karma
She got the news that her abuser died in peace after had been bedridden for ten years.
All the pots and pans were swept off the kitchen bench. The noise echoed off the tile floor. She torn the t-shirt that she was wearing, exposing her flesh. She gripped her hair with both hands until she felt the pain of her scalp. Thumping her fists on her thighs like a downpour.
She was angry. She was savagely angry.
You didn’t deserve to die. Died in peace? What’s that? What is that? You scum of the earth didn’t deserve to die. You deserved to rot in your own putrid karma. I deserve to die. I deserve freedom. I deserve innocence. Your death robbed me of everything, everything!
She felt empty after emptying out all her rage. Desolate, numb, nothingness, still haunted.
A Broken Home
Wisteria in late spring
Lilac purple like your heart
Falling
Falling
Embroidering the front lawn
You won’t leave now
You can’t
Your heart embedded in our garden
Will rot with my tears
Or burn in the summer sun
Time Apart
The space between us
Allows
Anger to be exhausted
Resentment to be overdone
Sadness to be evaporised
Memory to be filtered
And love to return
Thesaurus of Blank Pages
When I asked Bree to write together, she generously shared with me a poem she’d already crafted. I wrote in with her effortlessly like a little leaf floating along a river.
It’s difficult to find the words some days
I’m a thesaurus full of blank pages
Trying to dig between the emptiness
old stories stare back at me
characters having a banter party
without me
There must be unfinished business with those ghosts of my past
They invade my waking moments
eating up my creativity
thieving all the phrases that used to live inside my mind
I gather my strength
focus my weary mind
willing the words to come back
Surely if I shake the past hard enough
they’ll release all they hold captive
and start falling like cherry blossoms covering every crevice and crack of the page
Gumboots
I walked the distance under the grey sky
Let the rain quieten my mind
The gumboots you gifted me
were meant to keep me dry
They were love to me
I knocked on your door
waited patiently
You opened eventually
and showed me contempt
Still
I was so glad I came
I couldn’t run away from missing you
But I finally turned away from hatred
Strangely
my steps were lightened
in my water filled gumboots
Unapologetic
Under my tongue
lie unformed words
like a cluster of emotions
unspoken
hidden in the silence
you so despise
Being
me
is not enough
You demand reasons
for the way I am
Apology is not
a peace offering
that pleases you
I offer us peace
by biting my tongue
to set us free
Feelings
Feeling, you fickle little thing!
How did you deceive a heart so strong to break?
How did you hide from the mountain of sadness
to portrait such a bright grin
each and every day?
How much do you give out to the world to see?
How long do you want to stay behind the bars
of your own tangled web?
Feeling, I thought you were my watch tower.
And you truned out to be the red flags
that I couldn’t see.
Love
It’s ok to feel sorry for yourself.
But don’t allow youself drown in self-pity.
It’s ok to find comfort in others once in a while.
But don’t mistake it to be the only way out.
It’s ok to hate the offense others committed.
But don’t think for a while they should be hated too.
It’s ok to express anger.
But don’t let anger become your master.
Love is always the antidote.
Love saves one another.
Expressions
You said my face said it all.
I frowned when I was really mad at you
without uttering any offensive words.
I raised my eyebrows when I was skeptical
instead of questioning your integrity.
I looked far away when I was sad
with no trace of tears.
I couldn’t argue with you.
I didn’t see my own expressions.
Photo by Candice Picard unsplash.com
Flicker of Thoughts 