I frowned when I was really mad at you
without uttering any offensive words.
I raised my eyebrows when I was skeptical
instead of questioning your integrity.
I looked far away when I was sad
with no trace of tears.
I couldn’t argue with you.
I didn’t see my own expressions.
my heart is pounding
while my body is in sleep mode
my mind is lucid in another state
my mind is considering to
command my body to move
in a toss and turn
while is also persuading itself to
leave the body alone
‘we need to slow down the heart rate’
‘can’t do it coz she is upset and stressed’
‘let’s tell her to relax and breathe’ ‘she can’t coz she is blocking us’
‘true, that’s why her body shut down’ ‘yea, at least she is safe’
living in the gloomy dullness of life
I saw the piercing light
like the mobile phone notification flashing at night
walking through this unfamiliar tunnel
seeker of the illumination
stretch my arms to the walls
guiding my path in the pitch black
my fingers interpreting the rough fossils on the walls
they speak despair, torment, light and beauty
frame by frame these engraving paintings of art
I drench in all the emotions on offer
my kinesthetic fingers
reading them in wondrous
you are the light drawn me to the walk
your life I have experienced
in this tunnel of art
when I finally reach you
I will be undone, done and