Shower in the dark

Dedicated to Misha

There is something therapeutic about showers.

For years I had fostered a habit of taking a shower once I walked through my front door coming home from a day’s work.

The shower took my day off and it was like walking out from a hussle bussle world into my sanctuary. It was almost like a sanctifying ceremony.

The shower centred me and set the calm tone of the evening. I often felt afresh and renewed.

When I met you, the first thing I did was adapting your “shower in the dark” daily routine.

There is something else all together when showering in the dark.

When your surrounding is dim. You would have to rely a lot more on your sense of touch. When showering in the dark, it intensifies the transition from day to night, chaos to calm, cluttered to clear mind, exhaustion to rejuvenation. It restores me and makes me whole again.

I put music on sometimes if the sound of the running water is mono. Music is also more impactful when listening to in the dark.

Showering in the dark sparks all my senses with pleasure stimulation. Spurge of energy flew out to carry me into the mysterious night dancing with the stars. I become alive!

Melancholy

The blues landed on me today

Even the sky is shedding tears

Sadness trapped inside me

Exhaling in vain

Where are you hiding, my cheery clouds?

I lost you in my dreams last night,

neither could I see you now.

The beginning of my melancholy days…

Lullaby

(Image by Josh Knight)

rushing rain

twirling dust

wind, the ballerina

orchestrate the masterpiece

console my sleepless nights

soothe me with sweet dreams

破天急雨

尘埃降下
婀娜来风
淅沥交响 
昨夜辗转
今宵恬梦

God comes through

I know God is faithful and yet I still doubt.

Jacaranda blooms in spring gloriously on this patch of the earth.

In late Springs, I enjoy strolling down the street where they are all lining up and yearning each other. Romantic poems written about the magnificent jacaranda.

Yet, my inclination to jacaranda is God comes through by illustration of its splendour Spring after Spring overcame the nakedness in Winters.

Consider the lilies, how they grow: they toil not, neither do they spin.”

God IS Faithful!

You

There you stood
rooted deeply
unshakable
I had wandered for a long time
finally I came back
to you
There you are
standing tall and strong
riches in springs
sheltering in summers
splendid in autumns
withered in winters
You
watching over me
When I fix my gaze to you
I finally found
the centre of my world


ä½ 
站在那里
一直

不动摇的树
我
出走了
又回来了
树
仍旧坚立着
季节变更
华叶,枯萎

ä½ 

仍然守候
我
总回头望树
身边的世界
绕着你走

The song took me back…

 

 

When I was listening to Kazu singing ‘Miss you so much’, tears trickling down my cheeks. It reminded me of the heartache of young love.

 

 

Kazu reminds me of the sweet love I could have had in my youth. The raw wanting of each other and smitten with one another.

 

 

When I was in my early twenties I was so confused and suffered from such low self esteem regardless how attractive I was (according to friends). I was awkward and shy with a tendency to run from love. Although I had a group of friends (mostly boys) to hang out with, I was lonely and so alone inside in particular when surrounded by friends.

 

 

I was looking at me, the early twenties self, when I was listening to the song. I walked through the memory lane, wrapped my arms around Kazu’s neck, tippy toes to reach for a kiss…

 

 

當我在聽俊輝唱《我好想你》的時候,眼淚漸漸地滾落到臉頰。

 

俊輝讓我想到青蔥歲月中錯過的戀愛,那种純真本性的渴望和如膠似漆的卿卿我我。

 

 

在我二十來歲時,盡管朋友認為我有吸引力,由於自身的自卑感和內心的迷惘,我總對愛情有著逃亡的趨向。由此行為上總是羞澀和囧。雖然我總和一群人(大多是男生)一起戲耍,但我的內心總是那麼的孤獨寂寞。人越多,越寂寞。

 

 

聽著俊輝唱著的歌,我穿過時光隧道,仰著頭,踮起腳尖,雙手環繞著俊輝的頸脖,迎接他正落下的吻。。。

Peaceful

This short poem was originally written in Chinese. I translated into English and hoping did not lose its original flavour.

My freedom is deep in the ocean
serenity assured
My existence
no disturbance to your world
I sing by
breathing out bubbles
no judgement
no echoes
Immersing in navy
without the blues
In such dim darkness
I saw light

我的自由
是在深海里
尤其安祥
海洋的世界
不被我打擾
呼吸的泡泡
是我唱的歌
難聽
也沒有回聲
我眼前的藍色
不再憂郁
深海的漆黑
我的目光仍然明亮