your laughter is like
bell birds’ singing
whenever my mind
is in chaos
bird songs echo
in the bush of
nesting neural pathways
your laughter is like
tranquilizers injected
in my veins
I drift in and out of
your songs
in lucidity

your laughter is like
bell birds’ singing
whenever my mind
is in chaos
bird songs echo
in the bush of
nesting neural pathways
your laughter is like
tranquilizers injected
in my veins
I drift in and out of
your songs
in lucidity

People
in general
sap my energy
The funny thing is
when
I feel down
I go near them
they manage to
use more energy
of mine
to fuel a bright smile
on their faces
I wonder
how come
an empty tank
could be extracted
more and more
I made origami stars
to store them
in a glass jar
like so many memories
we made together
trapped in a fragile heart
When the glass shattered
those memories wandered
in a haunted house

there are times
the sound of the rain
becomes a never ending lament
the cold saturates my frame
spreads chills into my marrow
the feeling of not knowing
what tomorrow holds
weights down as
the threaded beads of rain
eroding the scanty soil

Our bodies are pleasured
in mechanical precision
spiral from bangs and pops
to a flatliner
The short lived happy hormones
are still
lingering in our minds
Our spirits have lost
their joyous sparks
in our world of
lack of
self expression
and
self love

Our entwined bodies crisp the satin sheet
Perfume and cologne sweeten the pungent sweat
The little bell on my bracelet
sings in harmony with moans and growls
like kittens playing on a lazy Sunday noon

Many times I had dreamt that
I held your callous hands
tugged myself under your hem
where you shielded me from the sudden rain
Many times I had convinced myself that
I was strong enough to fend for myself
from all the accusing fingers
which you would had crushed them without hesitation
Many times I had wished you were still here
to share the weather worn swing
sipping lemon tea together while
recounting our childhood mischiefs
I didn’t know that I had lost you
until so many times I had misplaced
my memory of your presence
They snugged up on me
in my most vulnerable state
where I had no tomb to crawl into
no means to make my way to you

I set out for a journey to forever
the path seemed bright and clear
back then
here I am
wandering indecisively
at the intersection
of another thwarted attempt
feeling lost in a panic
unable to read the street signs
written in a foreign language
hot coals are bubbling underneath my bare feet
the blazing sun is prickling my exposed skin
if only God will give me a sign
but in my malnourished mind
will I trust my own judgement
between a mirage and a vision
