Tag: Feeling

How i feel

Naughty little secret

( Image from medium.com )

I am your naughty little secret

only comes alive at night

you watch me dancing in the dark

delete after each show

I only hide in the cloud

every now and then

I surprise you with a peek-a-boo

holding our secret close

我是你的秘密
悄悄埋在夜里
偷窥后要删除
调皮躲在云里
不时露出惊讶
慌心诚守秘密

The bitter root

I love this city in dark silence

The vibrant and intellectual day fades into alluring artistic night scene

The hills lay off a man’s duty by day

The boy in me leaped out walking the streets

The songs came again from the car radio afar

My lips were chanting the familiar melodies my father once loved

I tilted my head up towards the moonlight

Holding the rolling tears in the well of my eyes

Big boys don’t cry!

Perhaps it’s the invitation of the blood moon night,

the open arms of the January assertive silence

I let out the forbidden wailing

Anguish to the lies, to the betrayal, to the abandonment

The boy in me were fueled by rawness of hurt

My howling to the moonlight returned needles on my skull

I grew in rage

Forcefully a man rose to stand tall

Declared vows and judgements

only God will break

Loners’ love

Two loners met

The distance is perfect

the space is perfect

the atmosphere is perfect

the company is perfect

They let each other into their inner most selves

One plus one still one

Bare and naked two loners’ hearts

Beating as one

We are like 2 pieces of jigsaw puzzles he said

I don’t feel I need to run from you she said

Tick tock tick tock

Time is trickling in harmony

24 hours round the clock

Two loners smile mischievously

Did I know you before they said

You found me

(Photo from picsbud.com)

Cupping my heart with your hands

My fairest

Bundle of warmth

In the desolate place, in the deep winter

Snowflakes melting

With you in my embrace

there is music and lyrics again

the ocean with hues

the valley with shades

My breathing once again meaningful

You came so I could be found again

Now my Love

My heart just blossoms in time for Spring

New Year’s post 2019

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 sums up 2018, a year of perseverance. I feel a call for patience in the new year.
May the fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control) be with me and you in 2019.

 

There is no we

You said you were ok
I didn’t agree
I embraced
I said I was sad
You didn’t respond
You walked away

The song took me back…

 

 

When I was listening to Kazu singing ‘Miss you so much’, tears trickling down my cheeks. It reminded me of the heartache of young love.

 

 

Kazu reminds me of the sweet love I could have had in my youth. The raw wanting of each other and smitten with one another.

 

 

When I was in my early twenties I was so confused and suffered from such low self esteem regardless how attractive I was (according to friends). I was awkward and shy with a tendency to run from love. Although I had a group of friends (mostly boys) to hang out with, I was lonely and so alone inside in particular when surrounded by friends.

 

 

I was looking at me, the early twenties self, when I was listening to the song. I walked through the memory lane, wrapped my arms around Kazu’s neck, tippy toes to reach for a kiss…

 

 

當我在聽俊輝唱《我好想你》的時候，眼淚漸漸地滾落到臉頰。

 

俊輝讓我想到青蔥歲月中錯過的戀愛，那种純真本性的渴望和如膠似漆的卿卿我我。

 

 

在我二十來歲時，盡管朋友認為我有吸引力，由於自身的自卑感和內心的迷惘，我總對愛情有著逃亡的趨向。由此行為上總是羞澀和囧。雖然我總和一群人(大多是男生)一起戲耍，但我的內心總是那麼的孤獨寂寞。人越多，越寂寞。

 

 

聽著俊輝唱著的歌，我穿過時光隧道，仰著頭，踮起腳尖，雙手環繞著俊輝的頸脖，迎接他正落下的吻。。。