Tag: Feeling

How i feel

Origami Souls

A collaborative effort of me and Benjamin Grossman.

The bountiful lilac purple wisterias curtain our bedroom window
The humidity of summer and the sound of cicadas wake us

My breasts swell in the cup of your hands
The curve of my body lazily responding to your offering

There is only one line you fit between
Fold me into origami with nothing but your tongue

Our bodies contort into a paper crane
Loving for 1000 years till we turn grey
Our souls take flight through the lilac purple haze into the flush blue eternity.

Anal-retentive

The Living Poetry prompt – Flustered

3pm is the worst time to start rearranging the pantry

Remove all the bits and pieces

Check expiry date and discard

Clean all shelves inside the panty

Clean pantry doors and frame

Clean all bottles, jars, packets, tins and cans

Recategorise all bits and pieces

Children have just came home from school wanting snacks and drinks among the chaos

Feeling flustered and losing control

My blood is boiling, scalp is heating up

Shouting, “Pack your bags and go back to school!”

Children stop

Then bursting in laughter, “Mum, you are losing it.”

Writers in The Current World

The world is

Frustrating

Depressing

And

Suppressing

It hammers

Our confidence

Hinders

Our influence

And tests

Our patience

Sublimation

This is a collaboration with Benjamin Grossman. I asked Ben to write with me in the hope that it would help me to overcome some difficult emotions. I think this poem achieved just that. I love the last line with all capital letters. It is exactly how I feel about emptying negative emotions by putting up a good fight, even it means shouting.

A State of Mind

It’s hard to to get into gear today.
Lunch time passed without me noticing the absence of breakfast.
I looked at the to do list trice and pretended nothing to do.
I sat very close to the window so daydreaming on clouds wasn’t too obvious.
Black coffee was kept warm by the sunlight through the window
while my cheeks sensed the burn.
I’ve never felt so good about being stuck in the present.
Tomorrow doesn’t need to come, really, stay here, right now!

It’s Not Meant to Be

We don’t need much encouragement to ignite a thousand fireflies.
Talking about the weather is our way to keep the ambience lukewarm.
People talk about chemistry or destiny.
Though we both know that it’s the knowing which only dreamers know; the touching which only lovers fathom.

We don’t need much encouragement to spread a wild fire.
Being silent is what we can master to mask the need.
People talk about soul mates or twin flames.
For us, it’s just two people happily know each other but never feel the need to meet.

We don’t need much encouragement to burn up heaven.
Leaving without saying goodbye is the only way that we survive from each other.
People talk about love and affair.
We know too well that we choose neither.


So it’s just like we said it would be, forever perfectly perfect.

影恋 (Shadow)

零时
醒来
影子
吓我
一跳

但是
寂寞
让我
与它
亲近

Midnight
Awake
Spooked
By my shadow

But
Loneliness
Makes me
Stay close

Gaslighting

Hey, I want to talk with you about something.

Ok, am I in trouble?

No. Just something I am feeling and going through lately.

Alright. You want a hug or something?

I am ok for now. I feel you don’t show me you love me like you used to.

What do you mean? You are the most important person in my life.

I’ll give you some examples…(examples given)

What do you mean? You know I love you! That goes without saying.

It’s not what you said or not said. It’s your action, lack of action for a better word. I feel unloved. And I can’t work out why I know you love me but I don’t feel you love me. There’s this big descrepency.

What? You wanna be rid of me? It sounds like you are picking on me.

I want us to discuss and work through this because I love you and I want us to work out.

All I know is that you are finding fault with me. I love you. I just love you. I can’t believe that you question that.

I am not questioning. I am sharing with you how I feel. (It’s about me, not you.)

I am upset that you accused me of not acting like I love you. I think about you 24/7. Everything I do, I do for us, for our future. I can’t believe that you questioned me.

(sobbing inside)…I don’t know. That wasn’t my intention. I just wanted to talk with you like adults without damaging our relationship.

There is not much to talk about. You either love me or not. I love you and that’s a fact.

I know you love me. But that’s not what I was confused about.

What are you confusing about then? I am not rich enough to send you flowers? I am not a successful man whom you are proud of? I am not a weak man who is afraid to stand up to you?

(Tears rolling down cheeks)…I don’t know. I don’t feel very well right now. I gotta go…

Lukewarm

She sits to watch
the epilogue of summer
pass by

Her pleated skirt waves
to the fading whistle
of the oceanic breeze

The memory of sunburn
sates the passion
she holds within

The frosty mornings
reminds her
the wisdom of waiting

And now
she grows frantic
in the lukewarm
fuzziness

 

She fights

Rain like this
brings incomprehensible
pain and sorrow

Day like this
all she wants to do
is to curl up in a ball
to sleep the time away

But she fights
to get up
get going
cos the thought of
breaking down
is far more
frightening